Who May Be Married Here

Saint Margaret of Scotland parishioners who have been registered for at least a year may celebrate their wedding in our parish church.  Our parishioners’ children who are members of other parishes may also be married in our church.  It is a requirement of the Roman Catholic Church that you have not been married before, either in a civil or a church wedding, with your former spouse still living, unless you have received a declaration of nullity or a dissolution of the former union.  Many weddings here are ecumenical in that one of the persons is not a Roman Catholic.  We welcome ecumenical weddings as long as one of the persons is a practicing Roman Catholic and has been a member of the parish for a year or more, or is the child of our parishioners and fulfils all other requirements as stated above.

 The pastor will give you a wedding application form.  When you have received a confirmation letter from the parish, you know your wedding date is on our calendar.  You may request a specific priest or deacon to officiate.  Visiting clergy are very welcome; they should get in touch with the pastor for the necessary delegation at least two months before the date of the wedding.  The State of North Carolina does not require the registration of duly ordained priests or deacons.

Clergy Assistance

When you know who is officiating, you should contact that clergyman as soon as possible.  He will arrange to meet with you and guide you through the preparation for your wedding.  He will begin gathering information for our permanent sacramental records, share the Church’s vision of Matrimony and work with you on the details of the liturgy itself.  If he is unable to supply marriage preparation, as, for example, because of distance, our parish uses other Marriage Preparation programs; we will be in touch with you about the details.

Music

Along with the clergyman officiating at your wedding, our Director of Music will meet with you to review the Church’s music for weddings, and guide you in the preparation of a wedding program. Please remember that only sacred music is allowed during church weddings. Please contact our Director of Music very early in your planning process.

Schedule

Weddings are usually scheduled on Saturdays at 11:00 am and 1:00 pm with rehearsals the evening before at 5:00 p.m. or 6:00 p.m. Weddings are not scheduled during Advent or Lent, because of the penitential nature of those seasons.  For practical reasons, weddings are not scheduled during a regular Saturday or Sunday Mass.

Rehearsal

Rehearsals may be scheduled on Friday evenings at 5:30 p.m., immediately following Evening Prayer.  All wedding rehearsals will be directed by the officiating priest or deacon, not by a wedding consultant.  We expect all those involved in the wedding liturgy to be present at the rehearsal. The marriage license must be received on the evening of the rehearsal. Musicians/vocalists should arrange a separate time for practice. 

 Flowers

It is customary for the couple to provide wedding flowers and these remain in the church over the weekend, reminding the parishioners to pray for the happy couple. When there are two weddings on a Saturday couples often arrange to share the flowers. The church’s vases are used. When the church is decorated for Christmas or Easter, you may not add flowers at the altar.

Photography

In order to preserve the solemnity of the ceremony and prevent misunderstandings, please request your photographer to consult with the priest or deacon regarding the taking of pictures during the ceremony.  Photographers are welcome during the wedding ceremony.  However, the following stipulations apply: under no circumstances may the photographer(s) enter the sanctuary at any time during the ceremony.  Video recording is to be done from a stationary position.  There should be no posed photographs during the ceremony, including stopping persons in the aisle during the processions.  Church furniture or appointments are not to be moved by the photographer, florist or any member of the wedding party.  Photographer’s pictures taken before the start of the wedding must be completed one half hour prior to the start of the wedding to allow sufficient time for all attendees to be seated.  An additional 20 minutes will be permitted for post-wedding pictures inside of the church. 

 Additional Guidelines & Information

Unity candles are not used, nor are runners.  Tape or tacks cannot be applied to the pews, and flower petals, birdseed or any other form of confetti are not strewn inside or out.

The consumption of alcohol on church property is strictly prohibited at any time before, during and after the wedding.  Guests are not to indulge in alcohol prior to arriving on church property.  Any violation of the above may result in the immediate cancellation of your wedding.  There is no smoking or vaping allowed inside the Church at any time.  Thoughtful consideration is to be made in regards to appropriate dress: we suggest “business-casual” for the Rehearsal and “formal” for the Wedding.  Hats or caps are always inappropriate for men in church.

When a wedding takes place between a Catholic and an unbaptized person, the celebration of the Eucharist is not permitted. The celebration of Mass for a couple of mixed religion is usually discouraged because of the inability of the non-Catholic party to receive the Eucharist. If, nonetheless, the Catholic party strongly desires to be married within the celebration of the Eucharist, it must be understood that no permission may be given for the other Christian party, or other non-Catholic guests, to receive Holy Communion.

It is essential that the rehearsals (one hour) and the wedding start and end on time.  Please be mindful that our parish has other events that occur in the church and that the priests and musicians have other responsibilities.  Excessive tardiness may put the celebration of your wedding at risk.

 On behalf of the whole parish family, I welcome your interest in Saint Margaret of Scotland Catholic Church and pledge our prayers for your happy engagement and holy life.

(The Rev.) W. Becket Soule, O.P.

1 August 2020